During their regularly scheduled meeting on Jan. 8, Garfield Re-2 School District Board members discussed state guidance on name changes from students in the district and how best to implement that policy to fit their values. 

The policy denotes that all schools in Colorado are required by law to adopt a policy on the subject of name changes. The Colorado Association of School Boards (CASB) supplied a sample of the policy that the Re-2 School Board will make changes to:

“This policy outlines the process by which students may change the name they are referred to at school to align with their gender identity. Students may choose to be identified in school by the first name that they have designated in accordance with this policy, and may request a change to their name or gender on their official student record through regulation JRA/JRC-R.” 

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The policy also covers the definitions of legal and chosen names, use of those names, official student records, disclosure to third parties and honest mistakes versus bullying in terms of using these names. 

During this first reading of the name change policy, the Re-2 board members cited some of their concerns. 

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“On that second page…it says ‘However, parents may be notified of their students name change if appropriate’, I think that ‘may’ needs to be ‘will’, and get rid of ‘if appropriate’,” said Fathom Jensen, vice president of the Re-2 School Board. “Because I think the parents need to be notified and this ties back into our communication with the parents.”

Board member Chance Jenkins agreed and said that every instance is appropriate. He read out a paragraph about honest mistakes occurring and the difference between those and deliberately not using a person’s chosen name or avoiding speaking any name at all when referring to a person. 

“So they’re compelling us to speak?” he asked. 

Jensen read out a portion from the policy about the knowing or intentional failure to use a student’s name as discriminatory. 

“That does not sit well with me, on the fact that if a child is given a nickname by fellow students that they don’t like and they are continually being called by that nickname, is that discriminatory?” she asked. 

The other board members said in a chorus with Jensen, “It’s bullying.” She continued and asked what the repercussions for that were going to be. 

Jenkins asked if they change a student’s name, do they have to broadcast it to the school, but the other members responded that they wouldn’t do that. 

“A student is to be given privacy’? It seems kind of contradictory, if a student is to be given privacy for their name change, but they want everyone to call them by their name change,” Jensen said. 

Jenkins added that at the same time, the student would be demanding that they call them by that name change. 

The board also had concerns about how difficult it would be for teachers to remember name changes and how CASB interpreted Colorado law about informing the parents. 

Travis Wilson, who works as an advocate for YouthZone and has experience working with LGBTQIA+ youth, but is speaking as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community, had some thoughts on these exchanges by the Re-2 School Board. 

“This is one of the hardest things about being in this community, because you’re at an impasse of ‘How do I approach this?” Wilson said. “I want to believe that most people aren’t speaking out of malice, they’re speaking out of ignorance and paranoia.”

Wilson went on to clarify that chosen names are not the same things as nicknames. 

“A nickname is a term of endearment or a quick abbreviated version of a name, like my name is Travis, a lot of people in my circle call me Trav. I appreciate that,” Wilson said. “But when I’m introduced in a formal setting, like in the courts, it’s not Trav Wilson, it’s Travis Wilson.”

A chosen name, Wilson said, is the real name, that name is what they want to be known as formally and commonly throughout. For example, someone named Travis choosing the name Taylor means they want to be called Taylor and nothing else.

“Typically, when someone has a chosen name, the old name is gone. It’s called a dead name,” Wilson explained. 

Wilson said that children who tell a teacher or a school about having a chosen name, they feel safe in that place, with those people. 

“They’re not saying this to defy or mess with you, they’re telling you that they feel safe, which is an honor,” Wilson said. “

From his experience with working with children and applying that to the conversation that was happening at the board meeting. 

“The majority of what I heard and what they had concerns over and what they were stating is, you’re thinking very black and white and you’re making this very simple,” Wilson said. “The world of children and education is nuanced and is not a monolith. You can’t make it this one, single, fixed, rigid thing.” 

Wilson went on to say that trying to box in a child, in any sense, going beyond identity or sexuality, that child will fail. 

He also talked about the transparency between a child and their parents and that when you work with children, the parents need to be involved, however, there is nuance to that. 

“To me, this is one of my golden rules of the work I’ve done, I got it from my mother, I carried it with me into my work, and it’s unequivocal, you cannot debate this with me,” Wilson said. “The safety of a child comes first, and yes, that includes letting the parents know everything.”

Wilson stressed that if the child’s safety is at risk, that should be the top priority, including above the parents’ comfort and knowledge. 

“Well, why can’t we tell the parent?” Wilson asked a theoretical question. “For whatever reason, they don’t want the family to know. Maybe a child is uncertain how their parents will react, maybe they’re paranoid about the parents’ reaction when really, it’ll be fine. You need to talk to the child about it.”

Sometimes, Wilson said, the parents’ reaction won’t help the child at all. 

“It still happens, but kids who are gay or trans get kicked out of their home,” he said. “If a child loses that space, then what do they have? There’s nothing else. It’s not even that the child told their parents, the parents found out.”

Wilson said there’s a risk that if a child changed their name at school and the school informs the parents, sending that child home to a possible hostile environment where the parents may retaliate, sometimes with violence. 

“Part of me wants to know, because I didn’t really hear them talk about that (in the board meeting), is, from a place of curiosity, do you know what that can mean?” Wilson said. “A lot of the time, kids are just experimenting. This is their identity, but just because they experiment, doesn’t mean they’re that forever.”

Wilson stressed that all these cases need to be taken one by one. 

“You’re taking a subject and you’re going way to the end of the road, but you don’t even know the layout of the road yet,” Wilson said. “You went around it.”

Wilson stated that he’d love to open communication with anyone willing to find out more about this subject and to the Re-2 School Board about the nuances of name changes or other questions about identity. Contact the Post Independent at ktomanek@postindependent.com to initiate this communication.